Online Dating First Message…the Initial Impression
We use online dating to meet other singles when there just isn't the time and opportunity to meet people during our busy schedule. But sometimes after we have found that ideal person, we freeze up and get stuck on what to say in our first online dating message.
Online dating often puts us in contact with hundreds of singles all at once. This makes it convenient and easy to look for other singles without the pressure of actually having to leave your home.
This form of dating usually gives singles the opportunity to take assessments that determine compatibility as well as other important factors. Plus, these sites frequently provide advice to help daters get noticed and find other compatible singles.
This advice can help guide you when it comes to creating a profile that evokes interest as well as drafting an online dating first message.
The information and pictures that you add to your profile should give other singles an idea of who you are. This is the place to debut your likes and values as well as what you're looking for.
This should include information regarding what you do for fun, the type of relationship you're looking for, and the values you consider important.
The Elements of a Good Profile
It's also a good idea to include lifestyle habits and preferences as well. For example, do you smoke? Do you work out daily? Are you vegan?
These are all factors that you may forget to include but go a long way when it comes to creating a clear picture of who you are.
If you think about it, when you browse other peoples profiles, the first thing you look at is the photo. But that only says so much.
You then want to read a descriptive profile to understand their interests and lifestyle. This helps you decide if you may be compatible and take that next step of sending the first message in online dating.
Online dating sites are designed to help singles get noticed. As a result, these sites offer advice on the best pictures to post and conversation starters as well as other helpful tips.
Bumble, for example, provides suggestions for your first online message. These include normal questions about lifestyle and favorite quotes to some funny questions about sleep.
Write something unique in your profile. What makes you who you are? What is special about your experiences and lifestyle?
The Need for Transparency
Most dating apps encourage transparency. This includes posting recent pictures of yourself and being honest about other aspects of your life. Many of these dating sites require photo verification to prove you are who you show yourself to be.
Additional tips encourage presenting a complete profile and using the numerous assessments available to connect you with compatible singles. The idea is to create an honest snapshot of what you're like as a person.
When you are setting up your dating profile, make sure to fill out as much information as possible. If the app offers questionnaires, then answer all of them if you can.
If there is information you want to keep private, that is ok. But this should be the exception. Remember, you are looking to connect with a life partner. The best way to find the ideal match is for each of you to know as much about the other person.
Online Dating First Message Contents
Once you've put together an honest and interesting profile, turn your attention to the online dating first message. This is the first message you will send to your person of interest.
Before you send a message, thoroughly read the profile of your person of interest. Mention anything in their profile that caught your attention as well as any areas of compatibility. This shows sincere interest.
If you both like to hike, then ask them what their favorite area to hike is. Or if they have a dog, ask what their name is.
Or simply tell them that you have the same interest as they do. This can help the other person feel relaxed and open to discussing that mutual interest.
Explore the Details
It's also a good idea to compliment non-physical features a person may exude. Perhaps they're outdoorsy, funny, or analytical. Whatever the case, focus on those points and ask relevant open-ended questions to create dialogue.
This is your opportunity to create a great first impression. Be sincere and reveal a little about who you are as well.
If you feel nervous then ask the other person about themselves. A lot of people find it easier to talk about themselves. Pay attention and listen to what they say. You will learn more about them as well as find further topics of mutual interest to discuss.
The First Message is the Ice Breaker
The idea is to break the ice and create a repertoire. That first online dating message can be an effective way to break the ice and create an ongoing dialogue. However, avoid obvious pitfalls by using proper grammar, being truthful as well as efficient in your message. Don't write a book.
Online dating can be an amazing opportunity to meet singles if you know how to create a compelling profile that invites interest and reciprocal communication. Put your best foot forward. Use recent pictures. Post information that reflects your likes, hobbies, and values.
However, don't exclude information that may seem insignificant but could be substantial to someone else. If you are a smoker, state it. If you value working out, express it. When you have children, add that to your profile.
This is all information that helps create a clear picture of who you are and what you like and value.
In addition, use that first message to show sincere interest by noting what you like about your person of interest. Put your best foot forward. Offer relevant information about yourself and ask open-ended questions.
Example Ice Breakers for Your First Online Dating Message
- What is your favorite quote?
- Who is your favorite author?
- What movie do you love the most?
- Name your favorite band and song.
- Is there a movie you have watched to so many times you know the words?
- How many hours of sleep do you need to be a functioning human?
- What is more important to you, late nights or early mornings?
- Where was the best place you have traveled to?
- List the top 3 things on your bucket list.
- Which is your favorite season and why?
- What is your favorite food?
- If you had to be an animal, which would you be?